A month of two halves

As we were away at the start of the month, I have only recently turned over the calendar to the September page. The beginning of the month is full:

1 September      
Fly to Bezier, travel on to Carcassonne
2-7 September   
Carcassonne
8 September     
Carcassonne, Bezier, home
9 September      
Unpack/sort out/catch up
10 September    
Osteopath appointment + frame and deliver print for next month's exhibition
11 September    
Day out at Tate Britain London with friends Jan and Peter to see the "Pre-Raphaelites" painting and "Another London" photography exhibitions and catch up on news over coffee, lunch and a bottle of Prosecco to round off the end of a lovely day
13 September
Steve's hospital assessment

After that, the calendar for the rest of September is empty. What happens in the second half of the month will depend on the outcome of Steve's assessment.  There are a few things pencilled in to my diary, but plans will not be firmed up until after tomorrow. That's the way it goes now.

Today is also blank on the calendar. That's the way I am trying to keep my mind. If I engage brain, inevitably I start thinking about tomorrow.  I can see us sitting in the consulting room, waiting for the oncologist to appear, hands getting clammy and that awful feeling in the pit of the stomach growing as each minute passes, waiting to hear the news....Not a very positive attitude, I'm afraid.

I must try to take a leaf out of Steve's book.  He seems to be upbeat.  Reminds me that he has no pain; says he is no more breathless now than he has been in the past, and attributes getting a bit puffed from time to time to mild asthma triggered by natural and environmental factors.  He also points out that I cough more than he does!  

Must also remember that as well as being Steve's assessment, 13 September is our son's birthday. Here's hoping that the assessment news will be a good birthday present for Jack!